A day off work for your birthday

You know how a lot of people like to book their birthday off work? Well here’s my advice which I truly believe to be golden – DON’T book your birthday off work, instead book off the day AFTER your birthday.

There are a number of reasons for this, but the first and most obvious is that, let’s be honest here, the night before a day off is generally more enjoyable than the actual day off itself. Similar to the ‘Friday Feeling’ (which is perhaps the most joyous part of the weekend) it’s all about the anticipation, the knowing you don’t have to be anywhere the next day. It changes everything and your whole evening feels different.

Even being at work is better knowing you have the next day off and when you’re driving, walking, cycling or commuting home that evening you can’t help but feel elated at the thought of a whole evening ahead with no sandwiches to make, no rush trips to Asda because you don’t have any cereal bars and most importantly (so effing important) no alarm to set!

Your actual day off is nice of course and what a super treat not having your alarm beeping angrily at you at 5.45am (as mine does Mon – Fri). But as the day creeps on, whatever you’re doing, you can’t help but occasionally glance at the clock with a slight sense of impending doom. You start to wonder how many emails await you tomorrow or how many hours are left before the alarm gets angry again.

It’s not that your day off isn’t pleasurable, it’s just that the vibe – for lack of a better word – doesn’t ever seem to really compare with the free and easy feeling you felt the night before where everything laid ahead of you still. The whole night your own and the world your LOBSTER.

So that’s why I say book the day off after your birthday. What could be more of a treat than travelling home from work on your birthday, feeling excited, happy and relaxed about a no hassle evening where you can go to bed as late as you want and drink as much Pinot as you can handle. If you have your ‘birthday day’ off work then all you’re really doing is filling a massive egg timer with sand and waiting for that inevitable “shit I’ve got to go to work tomorrow” feeling to kick in.

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Plus, if you work with nice people like I’ve generally been lucky enough to do, you’ll be made a fuss of in the office anyway. Birthdays were a big deal at the place I used to work and you’d walk in to a desk laden with balloons, confetti, cards, wine, more wine, presents and maybe a bit more wine. Usually lunch out with the girls or even a Dominoes in the staff kitchen.

Either way a birthday at work should be a relatively enjoyable day and no-one will give you much work to do anyway. Even management will feel slightly awkward and illogically guilty when they see the penis shaped balloon sellotaped to your PC – they don’t want to be the bad guys who require you to do actual work.

So basically there it is and you can thank me later. Get up early on your birthday with a bit more adrenaline and gaiety than usual – because obviously, it’s your birthday. Treat yourself to a special breakfast maybe, like a whole tube of Pringles or five jam donuts. Open your cards and hear your phone buzz with well-wishers and a Papa John’s discount code. Get to work, still feeling happier than usual. Maybe have something special for lunch like a whole block of Cathedral City Extra Mature Cheddar and then…. well then you just feel so happy because it’s your birthday and…

YOU KNOW YOU HAVE THE NEXT DAY OFF WORK!!!

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About emmakwall

Films, books, soundtracks, good humour
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30 Responses to A day off work for your birthday

  1. Well said. This is more or less why we Scots have a bank holiday on the second of January.

  2. M. C. Dulac says:

    Such good advice!

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