Films I Watched In: February


Firstly, I must apologise for being rubbish and watching too much Family Guy / Tattoo Fixers / Pawn Stars / The Chase / Channel 5 documentaries about benefits and all the other shit* I find to watch on a daily basis rather than the movies I should be watching.

*The Chase isn’t shit. I bloody love The Chase.

February was pitiful in terms of film quantity. I watched a grand total of….five movies. Yep, five movies over 29 days. Three of which were re-watches and one of those I watched just last month. Go Emma! Don’t I work tirelessly to make this blog a buzzing hub of the latest film news and hot topics.

Anyway the two new movies I watched were Zoolander 2 (2016) and The Hateful Eight (2015). You can read their respective reviews here and here but if you just want the short answer, which is often preferable – yes I enjoyed them.

My re-watches included Amy (2015) – the documentary film on the late Amy Winehouse which I also reviewed (and you can read here). I only watched it again so soon because it was showing on TV but it really is brilliant and I was just as captivated the second time around.

Orphan (2009) and Con Air (1997) were the other two films I re-watched and I’m sure most people have seen them? Well surely everyone has seen Con Air. If you haven’t, I’m not sure we can be friends. Because man I love Con Air – but more of that in a minute.

Orphan is the horror movie about the psychotic girl who looks like Stacey Slater from EastEnders at the end when she’s full on rage and murdering. And that doesn’t give anything away I hope – don’t most horrors end up with rage and murdering?

Poor thing, I know how she feels. I often feel disheartened and angry when I take my make-up off too.

giphy-facebook_s

It’s actually not a bad little film. Not really that scary, but kind of horrible in places. More a thriller / horror / mystery. Slight unintentional humour which mainly stems from the camp, patronising, annoying dad and of course a few ‘as if’ moments too. But who cares, it’s a horror film. I want ‘as if’ moments.

Well that’s pretty much it I guess. Without much left to say I thought I’d make a list of the five funniest bits in Con Air.

Actually six – the first one is this picture.

No. 1

nicholas-cage-con-air

No. 2

The way it’s implied that Steve Buscemi’s freedom at the end is a good thing – despite him killing loads of people and wearing a “girl’s head as a hat”. Oh, but he didn’t do anything bad to the little girl in the trailer park and he does makes funny comments on the plane, so he must be alright!

garland greene3.JPG

No 3.

The way John Cusack looks at Nicolas Cage when he jumps on the police motorbike in Vegas. Poe is soooo outlandish! It just makes me laugh. Here’s the picture and a conversation I like to imagine is happening telepathically:

Poe: “I’m taking this bike.”

Larkin: “Poe….you just got out of jail. You can’t just jump on a police bike like you own the place! I’m a US Marshall for god’s sake and I appreciate your help whilst the plane was in the air but we have plenty of back-up. Seriously, what are you doing? Go and see your fucking family, they’ve been waiting eight years to see you and do you know how many times you almost died today? You’ve never even met your daughter! And you have no authority at all to be on that bike.”

Poe: “I’m taking this bike.”

Larkin: “Yeah….it’s the right thing to do.”

vlcsnap-2015-10-06-00h12m26s82

No. 4

The way Cyrus the Virus ‘hides’ at the top of the ladder and looks directly at Poe when he’s doing his SECRET ESCAPE from the Vegas strip, on top of a fire engine.

Annoyingly I can’t find a picture of this anywhere but hopefully someone will know what I mean and is nodding their head in agreement right now!

No. 5

When John Cusack persuades Colm Meaney NOT to blow up the hijacked and highly unstable convict plane (in the middle of the desert where it’s relatively safe) because….because…”because there’s a good man up there goddammit!”

Only for a hideous crash landing to then take place in the center of Las Vegas where carnage and explosions ensue and an entire casino full of people gets destroyed. Outstanding decision!

No.6 

“That’s a rock.”

Advertisements

About emmakwall

Films, books, soundtracks, good humour
This entry was posted in Films I Watched In and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

88 Responses to Films I Watched In: February

  1. CON AIR. Man I need to rewatch that masterpiece hahahah

  2. movierob says:

    so Ive only seen 3 of ur 5 🙂

    bet u cant guess which one’s I havent seen and probably wont or maybe u can 🙂

  3. table9mutant says:

    Ha! Nice job, Emma! Nothing wrong with not going overboard on watching movies. Hehe… Orphan! That was indeed unintentionally funny at times. I, too, quite like Con Air! And I’m not a Nicolas Cage fan. It’s silly but it’s good, popcorn-action-movie fun. 🙂

  4. You’ve had quite the busy month Ems! I was surprised at how much I liked Con Air because I’m really not a Nicholas Cage fan.

  5. TheMarckoguy says:

    Wanna be my “Con Air” buddy?

  6. The Vern says:

    YES!!!!! Con Air Great Choice. Oh im rewatching this one tonight. I still own the VHS(Letterbox edition). Still have not seen Amy but hopefully will very soon

    • emmakwall says:

      THAT’S the kind of comment I love Verny, WE LOVE CON AIR!!!!

      That is so cool you have the VHS still, and I’d watch Con Air over Amy anyway 🙂

      What do you reckon, which is better – Con Air or Face Off?! Hard to choose isn’t it!

  7. beetleypete says:

    Other than Family Guy, you have to admit, that other TV stuff is really shit. (OK, so you won’t, but I had to say it. Because it’s true)
    HOWEVER, I have a lot of time for ‘Orphan’ (love the scary girl), and ‘Con Air’ too, which is always worth a mindless telly watch.
    Nice one, Em.
    As ever, Pete. xxx

    • emmakwall says:

      Hmmm! 🙂

      Out of all those TV shows I’m surprised you’d prize Family Guy at the top. I’m genuinely surprised you don’t like Pawn Stars, have you ever seen it properly?

      And I will not hear A WORD against The Chase 🙂 OR Bradley Walsh!!! Tattoo Fixers and Channel 5 are generally pretty mindless. But plenty of the C word in both!

      Con Air is amazing isn’t it! I can never decide what I prefer between that and Face Off. Each time I watch one, I think “that’s my favourite” then I watch the other one and think “nope, that’s my favourite!”

      Interesting story I know 🙂 xxx (but they don’t make action movies like that anymore!)

      • beetleypete says:

        I would have Con Air over Face Off anytime. As for the televisual disagreements, we will have to put that down to age differences, I reckon. (Though Bradley Walsh and Stephen Mulhern should both be hung by their goolies from a lamp-post, so that I can go and laugh at their suffering…) As ever, Pete. xxx

        • emmakwall says:

          I don’t think it can be an age thing, my grandad actually got me into Pawn Stars and he turns 76 next month! I don’t think you’ve even seen it…..! :p

          Family Guy and Tattoo Fixers probably more for the youngsters (not that I’m a youngster myself as such). Though I haven’t been watching Family Guy as much as ITV insist on showing episodes that are 100 years old…..

          I think I might prefer Con Air a LITTLE bit to Face Off too – but oh god Face Off is great.I love Travolta in it!

          How are you feeling today by the way? At least we’re having a bit of nice weather, hope you’re okay!!! xxx

          • beetleypete says:

            OK I confess. I haven’t watched Pawn Stars, and never will. You got me…I haven’t watched Family Guy since BBC3 sunk without trace either. But I still hold out against the other stuff, which I have been unfortunate enough to have watched. 🙂
            Anyway, the weather cheered me up, and I can see better in the sunshine. So thanks for asking, because you are nice, and do things like that, which is why I like you so much. xxx

            • emmakwall says:

              That’s okay Pete 🙂 I’m glad you felt a bit more cheerful, hope that’s gone into today as well?! Quite sunny in Essex, hope it is in Norfolk! You’re very nice too 🙂

              I do miss Family Guy on BBC3, that late at night, it was just ‘always’ something to watch! They’re showing really old episodes on ITV2, you know the ones where they sound different and look different!

              How is Ollie? 🙂 xxx

            • beetleypete says:

              Ollie made a good recovery on his tablets, but he has slipped back to some occasional head-shaking again now. We cannot seem to get on top of this ear trouble, and it’s a shame to see him like this. If it doesn’t stop, he will be back to the Vet yet again. xxx

        • vinnieh says:

          By their goolies, ooh now that would be really painful.

  8. mikeladano says:

    Pawn Stars…Aww, Chumlee 😦

  9. vinnieh says:

    It’s been ages since I last saw Con Air. You make me want to see it again now.

  10. newguy87 says:

    Turbo Kid that is it

Any thoughts?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s